In honor of Goodreads
latest Ask the Author Question – Can
you tell us a two-sentence horror story – I give you four of them, just for
writers. Please add your favorite in the
comments.
“I’ve never
written a review before, but this last book was so spectacular that I went to
all the popular sites – Amazon, Goodreads, B&N, Kobo,” said the
reader. “It completely deserves the
one-star rating I gave it.”
‘Thanks for
your submission,’ read the email from the publisher. ‘If you haven’t heard from us in 13 months,
we’re not interested…or the backlog is even bigger than we expected.’
The police
detective frowned at the mystery writer, saying, “I’m sure you’ve heard about
the string of grisly murders in the area, each more gruesomely inventive than
the last. After looking at your online
searches and the books you’ve gotten from the library, you need to come with
us.”
“The sixth revision of your latest novel has great
potential,” said the agent to writer. “We
just need to tweak the plot a bit, change the protagonist’s accent from western
Australian to lower Bronx, put the sections we changed to ‘telling’ back to ‘showing,’
reverse the order of the two twists, change the setting from 1800s England to
the 1980s in the US, which means the hero can go back to being a disgraced Navy
seal with a multibillion-dollar, reality TV series, make the protagonist’s love
interest left-handed, and for god’s sake, kill all the run-on sentences.”
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